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Dreadful Nonsense

"I've read your blog. it's really funny. you should write a column." - Jon Ronson

Dear Sirs

Customer No.: xxxxxx
Order No.: xxxxxx

I refer to the four emails I have attached to this correspondence, and to the three phone calls I have made to your customer support services.

A brief summary of the story so far:

· I placed an order on Tuesday, and paid for next day delivery.
· On Wednesday the order did not arrive.
· When I call customer services, they said the order had not been received, and that I should re-order my gifts, or find gifts from another source.
· On Wednesday evening, I bought alternative gifts from another source.
· On Thursday, I received an email saying my order (which previously didn't exist) had been dispatched.
· On Thursday afternoon, I called customer services, who could not confirm when the order would be delivered.
· On Thursday evening, I called customer services again, who told me that my order would be delivered in January. I was advised again to find gifts from another source.
· I tried to cancel my order, but was advised that I could not do this, that I would be charged for the order, and would only receive a refund when the order came to my house, was refused, was kept in a warehouse by Parcelforce, returned to your depot and reprocessed.
· This morning (Friday), the parcel arrived at my address.

A briefer summary:
· I ordered them on Tuesday.
· On Wednesday they didn't exist.
· On Thursday they'd come in January.
· On Friday they arrived.

Since I was advised on two occassions by your customer services to buy gifts from elsewhere, that is what I have done. I no longer want this order. I have asked to cancel this order. This order has alternatively been lost, non-existent, arriving in January and is now sitting in my house.

My main issue now is getting a refund for the delivery costs I paid, since I ordered the next day delivery service on Tuesday, and they did not arrive on the next day.

I will consider whether or not to send the entire order back for refund, in accordance with your refund policy, in the near future.

In the meantime, I would be grateful if you would finally reply to at least one of these five emails, as I am incredibly unhappy with the service I have received from you.

Yours sincerely


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