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Dreadful Nonsense

"I've read your blog. it's really funny. you should write a column." - Jon Ronson

The biggest difference between every day life and being on holiday, of course, was the presence of the two tiny furry hairy things that pretty much dictate your every movement because (a) they're your responsibility and ultimately rely on you in actual life and death terms and (b) they're incredibly cute and also very intelligent and it's really brilliant when one of them (Bobby) torments the other one (Kesh) until she loses her temper and lashes out, at which point Bobby runs away and wags his tail in delight, before starting again moments later.

They're both particularly fond of beach walks, so I decided the second day we were there that we'd drive out to one of the long stretches of beach that we used to visit as kids during our Summer holidays. I was confident that I'd be able to find it, since the directions are pretty much "drive along the road, turn left and then just keep driving until there's no road left", but brilliant I still managed to get us a little bit lost.

By the time we arrived at the beach it had started to rain a little bit. "Never mind that," He Who Only... announced, "it's just a squall." Squall it is, we decided, and unloaded the now yapping and leaping bundles of dog hair out of the car. They sprinted off ahead of us while we pulled up our hoods, rolled up our trousers and headed out into the squall.


Kesh and Bobby were completely oblivious to the rain as they ran around the beach, occasionally making a dart for any bird with the nerve to come within 50 yards of the beach, and constantly running up to each other to nip at each other's heads, or running back to one or both of us to jump up to our knees and have us tell them how great they are. Within two seconds, Bobby was in the sea barking in delight. He absolutely loves the sea, because he is too ridiculously stupid to realise that he shouldn't, and will dive headfirst into anything that looks like it's wet. Kesh isn't quite as keen, which is why when we she accidentally ran into a puddle that was an awful lot deeper than she expected and had to swim her way back out, I laughed until I cried while she looked up at me in disgust.


We carried on walking through the "squall", which was obviously actually a real life rain storm and were, within 10 minutes, wetter than we'd ever been in our lives while still fully clothed. An hour later, we returned to the car and had a brief comedy moment where we tried to get the dogs into the boot, and they both tried to avoid getting into the boot by walking around and around the car out of our reach so that we coudn't pick them up. We then stripped off our coats and climbed into the car, and at that very moment it stopped raining. It didn't rain again that day.

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