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Dreadful Nonsense

"I've read your blog. it's really funny. you should write a column." - Jon Ronson

I was going to write a lovely big post about my brilliant new phone and all the music that it plays in my ears and all the lovely photographs that it takes for me, and the fancy colours and buttons and radio and all these lovely things, but... it blew up. The phone exploded. All I did was have a temper tantrum and pour some petrol on it and then throw a match at it, and then it exploded. Imagine that.

Mind you, it's all the bloody thing deserved.

I had no idea when I agreed to take the phone for free in a ridiculous offer that seemed to be too good to be true that the offer was actually too good to be true. New mobile phones have new problems with new bugs and new ways of fucking me off and making me want to cry. It keeps corrupting photograhs, and mixing up songs, and deleting entire albums and just plain not working. Oh yeah, the phone part works - that works very well indeed, and really I shouldn't complain too much about the rest of it but the PURE FRUSTRATION makes me want to pour some petrol on it and then throw a match at it and so I did.

Anyway. Here, to make up for me moaning about the problems I have with the cool free things that people give me, is a photograph of my poorly toe, a week after dropping a shelf on it. I think you'll agree with me that it's quite green.


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