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Dreadful Nonsense

"I've read your blog. it's really funny. you should write a column." - Jon Ronson

Today, Susan left for sunny London town, leaving me bereft of her company and suddenly lacking in any long- or short-term plans. It's very odd to suddenly be thrown back in to the mundanity of no job, no hobbies, no time-table, no goals, no plans to go on Viking tours in the next few days. I mean, I could carry on going on tour buses and wandering around scenic areas of Ireland, but it's not really the same without a chirpy English lady standing beside you, taking photos and talking about your cat. It really isn't.

Yesterday, we did a tremendously great thing, and went on the Viking Splash Tour, something I am now going to make everyone that comes to stay in Dublin do. I may also take to dragging tourists I don't even know on it, just so I get the thrill of driving straight off the road and in to water again. It really is the oddest thing you can do in Dublin. During the day at least.

The tour of Dublin itself is great, with the guide adding in a great amount of fiction to go along with the interesting facts (do you know that O'Connell bridge is the only square bridge in the world? I do), and roaring at unsuspecting passers by on the count of three is always a great thing to do no matter where you are, but the best moment is when you get to the docks and they make you put on life jackets and then say very serious things about drowning and safety and swimming and not panicking. And then. They. Drive. Straight. In. To. The. Water.

Me and Susan didn't stop laughing for about 5 minutes, and didn't hear a single thing the man said. It was so terrifying and hilarious and wrong and stupid and brilliant. And you see the back of the building that U2 record their albums in. From the car. While being in water. It's the car in the water that appeals to me, you see.

So that's the best thing we did in Dublin, other than meeting Aqualung. And spending over €100 each on Clinique products in Arnotts. And getting french manicures for our nails by a lovely chinese lady who made my nails all square and ugly.

And now Susan has departed. JC has emailed me, asking "have you covered your face in ashes and made a fort out of your pillows that you refuse to come out of?" Which has given me an idea.

This entry was posted on 15 March 2004 at 7:43 pm. 0 comments

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