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Dreadful Nonsense

"I've read your blog. it's really funny. you should write a column." - Jon Ronson

Sorry I’ve been quiet of late – not much to say, and not many ways of saying it.

I’ve made a few decisions – to give up some things and to take up others, to move on and to stay put. My pension kicks in in two weeks time. My rent goes up in two months time. I’m going to be 26 in four weeks time. I might be starting an Open University course in February. I might be moving flats. I might be moving countries. I’m going to give up smoking again. I’m going to re-dye my hair. I’m going to lighten up.

What is it about the on set of winter that makes you reassess everything?


Friday Five

1. What size shoe do you wear?
I wear a size 6, which means that usually whatever style of shoe I pick is already sold out. But I can also wear a 5 or a 7, depending on how much I want those shoes.

2. How many pairs of shoes do you own?
I only own one pair of shoes, which I keep at work and only wear in the office. I own three pairs of runners/trainers/sneakers, of which one pair has a leak, one pair is falling apart, and one pair are new and never leave my feet. They’ve got a built up sole which makes me taller. I own one pair of huge boots, which I adore and can never wear, except to parties. I own one pair of red clogs, which I never wear. I own one pair of blue doc martin boots, which I never wear. I own two pairs of sandals. I have no slippers.

3. What type of shoe do you prefer (boots, sneakers, pumps, etc.)?
I prefer no shoes at all, thanks. But given the choice, always with the runners. I hate wearing shoes. And anything with heels brings me out in a rash. I don’t do heels.

4. Describe your favorite pair of shoes. Why are they your favorite?
My favourite pair of all the things I have to put on my feet are my boots, which are knee length and black. They have a zip up the side, and a built up Spice Girls stylee sole which gives me an extra five inches in height. They are very easy to walk in, but make me nervous walking down stairs. After about five hours they really hurt my feet, but after six hours my feet go numb and don’t hurt any more. They are ideal for parties. They have been to two weddings as well.

5. What's the most you've spent on one pair of shoes?
The most would be for these boots, which was about £70 I think, but Mum paid for half. So probably £40 for my work shoes, then. But they are quite nice, and not really like shoes at all. I don’t like shoes.

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